Protecting the Replacement
by Moka-chan
Summary: AU. Hidan thought his life was boring, until he met Kakuzu and discovered what was really going on. KakuHida and bits of SasoDei and KisaIta.
1. Chapter 1

Well, this is my first fan fiction so please be gentle!

Disclaimer: Kakuzu, Hidan, and any other random Akatsuki members are not mine

Warning: May contain yaoi, cursing, etc. Don't like, don't read.

--

_Drip…drip…drip…_

Two demonic green eyes opened, turning to glare at the sink. Sitting up, the young man sighed and ran a hand through thick, black hair. He couldn't get any sleep. Looking around the lab, Kakuzu swung his legs around to the side of the bed, groaning loudly. Maybe it was because of what was going to start tomorrow, his first mission. Laying back down, Kakuzu turned onto his side.

"Stupid scientists." He murmured as he pulled the thin blankets closer. Closing his eyes, Kakuzu buried his face in the pillow and soon drifted off sleep.

_Ring…ring…ring_

Hidan slammed his hand down on the alarm clock, glaring at the infuriating thing. Pulling himself out of bed, the teen walked into the bathroom, greased back his hair, and stumbled into the living room. A blue-haired woman looked up from her newspaper, smirking slightly at the boy.

"Oh Hidan-chan!" Konan said cheerfully, an evil glint in her eye. Hidan yawned and eyed her suspiciously. "What?"

Still smirking, Konan pointed at the clock. "You're going to miss the bus." Panicking, Hidan glanced at the clock, gasped and ran out the door, grabbing his backpack on the way out.

"Silly kid."

--

So…good? Bad? So-so? Sorry if Kakuzu's part confused you, it'll make more sense later…I hope…;


	2. Chapter 2

So, the second chapter! This one will explain Kakuzu a bit more…

--

Hidan grumbled to himself. Stupid Konan. Setting the clocks a couple of minutes forward so he thought he was late. The teen had discovered the woman's prank after a couple minutes of just standing there. Sighing, Hidan looked around and noticed someone standing in a yard a couple of houses over. The person was extremely tall, probably over six feet, and dressed in something like a trench coat, but with a hood. 

"Hey you!" Hidan called loudly, "You in the black jacket! Come here!" 

Looking up, the man turned to Hidan and said teen felt a shiver run up his spine as the man looked at him blankly. The man had strange green eyes, they were black where the white should have been and had no pupils. The man was also wearing a black mask that covered his nose and mouth.

"What do you want?" The man asked as he walked closer, looking Hidan over. 

Hidan huffed, glared at the man indignantly. "Well, I was going to ask for the fucking time but it seems some bastards are too rude to even do that properly!" He shouted, turning away from the man. But this did not last long because a couple of seconds later, Hidan heard the man chuckling and judging from where the sound came from, the man was now right behind Hidan. 

Whirling around, the white-haired teen scowled at the very tall man. "Get away from me you perv!" 

The man just chuckled some more before he leaned closer, tilting his head. "It's 6:23." He said, smiling, or Hidan thought he was. "Since I answered _your_ question, how about you answer _mine_." 

Frowning, Hidan took a step back, looking at the taller man suspiciously. "OK, I guess I can…" He said slowly. 

"Good. Do you happen to know where Konan Hitsuki lives?" 

For a second, Hidan was at lost for words, which didn't happen often. "Um, yeah. She lives at 405 Elm; it's the next street over." 

Nodding the man gave a short bow. "Thank you, Hidan-sama." He said quickly before disappearing behind the trees on the other side of the street. Hidan blinked, shocked. How did that man know his name! Turning as a yellow bus pulled up to the street Hidan tried to find the man before he got on the bus, but there was no sign of him.

--

Thank you for reading! Please review! 


	3. Chapter 3

Kakuzu knocked on the door softly, shuffling nervously. He nearly flinched when the door swung open to reveal Konan, who smiled at Kakuzu and let him in. 

"Hello Kakuzu-san. Please make yourself at home." Konan said, gesturing for Kakuzu to follow her into the kitchen. She pushed Kakuzu down gently into a chair and sat down across from him, her face serious. 

"I suppose you're here for your mission, yes?" Konan asked quietly. When Kakuzu nodded in response, she continued, "Well, as you know, Hidan is a very important subject for Akatsuki. He's very valuable for the company's future. Since his abilities haven't exactly kicked in yet, we want you to watch over him."

Kakuzu nodded again, smirking sadly. "And I suppose you know what will happen to me after this mission, right?" 

Konan smiled back a Kakuzu, pity in her eyes. "Yes. I'm very sorry Kakuzu, but after the mission you are to be disposed of."

--

Hidan doodled quietly on his notebook, drowning out the idiotic teacher. He jumped as the bell and stood, picking up his stuff. Darting towards the bus, Hidan was able to avoid the punks that liked to pick on him. As he reached the safety of the bus, Hidan looked out the window and flicked off the punks, who glared at him. 

"Good day, I presume." A voice suddenly said beside him. Hidan glanced to his side and smiled mischievously at Deidara, his best friend.

"Yeah, well, besides the fact that some creepy dude I've never met knew my name this morning. Besides that, it's all good!" 

Deidara chuckled at his friend and smirked. "Looks like you have a stalker."

"Nah, Konan knows the guy I think. Probably her boyfriend. They'd be perfect for each other!"

After a couple of minutes of talking with his friend, the bus stopped at his stop and he got off, humming to himself happily. He walked up to his house and opened the door to find Konan in the living room. 

"Hey Konan-chan. What are you doing home?" Konan looked up at Hidan and smiled, standing up and wrapping an arm around Hidan's shoulder. 

"Hidan, I'd like for you to meet your new roommate! Kakuzu, come here." Hidan frowned and turned around when he heard foot steps some from the kitchen. When he saw his new 'roommate' Hidan gasped and stepped back. 

"You!" 


	4. Chapter 4

Kakuzu blinked, tilting his head to the side. "Me?" 

"Yeah _you_! You're that creepy guy from this morning!"

Konan hit Hidan over the head, glaring at him. "Don't be so impolite! Greet Kakuzu properly!" 

Hidan grumbled, rubbing his head. Glancing up at the man, Kakuzu, Hidan forced a smile. "Um, welcome to our home." Turning to Konan suddenly, the teen looked at fearfully. 

"Did you say he was _my_ new roommate?" 

Konan hit Hidan again and looked at Kakuzu apologetically. "I'm sorry for his rudeness; he can't control that mouth of his." The woman then turned to Hidan and nodded. "Yes, Kakuzu's going to be staying in _your_ room." 

Kakuzu looked between the two nervously. Wow, they were worse that Kisame and Itachi when they fought and that was saying something. "Um, are you sure? I can sleep on the couch." 

Konan turned to the taller male and smiled sweetly, patting his arm. "Of course not! You deserve a nice room! Hidan, show Kakuzu where your room is while I make dinner." 

Hidan gaped at Konan for a second before following her instructions, motioning for Kakuzu to follow him and walking down the hallway. Konan _never_ made dinner. Hidan didn't even know she knew how to cook. It was Kakuzu's presence, Hidan realized. Konan cared more for the giant than the boy she's been taking care of for his whole life! Glaring at Kakuzu, Hidan opened the door to his room and walked in, plopping down on the bed when he crossed the room.

"Don't touch any of my stuff." Hidan growled at Kakuzu as the man entered his room. Kakuzu glanced at Hidan strangely and sighed, stuffing his hands into his pockets. 

"Don't worry Hidan-san." He said politely, exiting the room quietly. 

At dinner

Hidan snickered as he watched Kakuzu gap at his plate, which contained a mountain of food. Konan had made a feast that could probably feed fifteen people and by the looks of it, Kakuzu's plate held enough to feed eight of them. 

"I hope this is enough Kakuzu-san! A growing teen needs his food after all!" Konan said cheerfully as she set down the plate and started piling food onto Hidan's. Hidan frowned at Konan and Kakuzu. 

"Growing teen? Konan, he's already grown enough!" A thud echo through the kitchen as Konan hit Hidan with the spoon. 

"Don't talk like that about guest! And for your information, Kakuzu's only nineteen! That's only a three year age difference between you two and you're still growing, that means he is too!" Hidan glanced at Kakuzu to notice the man smile at Konan and him. Konan glanced at Kakuzu also and reached out, pulling his mask down. 

"Take off that mask so you can eat." Konan scolded playfully, sitting down. Hidan stared at Kakuzu, surprised to see thick strands coming from the corners of the man's mouth. Kakuzu nodded to Konan and took a bit of his food.

"Thank you Konan-san." Kakuzu said quietly, looking at the woman shyly. Hidan noticed Konan's smile drop for a second, a sad look replacing it. She nodded to Kakuzu. 

"Don't worry about it Kakuzu. It's the least I can do. After all, you only have so much time left-here I mean!" Hidan glanced at Konan at the last part of her sentence, frowning. He got a feeling that the woman was keeping something from him, but he didn't say anything about it, spending the rest of the meal in silence.

---

Well, sorry this chapters kind of boring. It kind of has a family feeling to it I guess...The next chapter will hopefully be more exciting. 


	5. Chapter 5

_Kakuzu looked around the dark room nervously. Where was he? He froze when he heard foot steps behind him. Turning he was surprised to see Hidan behind him, smiling warmly up at him._

"_Hidan-san?" Kakuzu asked, frowning. "What are you doing here?"_

_Hidan just kept smiling as he held a hand out. "Come here Kakuzu." He ordered, stepping closer. Kakuzu gave a nodded and reached out, grabbing onto Hidan hand gently. Suddenly, Hidan's smiled changed to a smirk and strange black ooze started to surround Kakuzu's hand. Trying to pull away, Kakuzu struggled with Hidan's grip. _

"_Let go Hidan! Stop!" He shouted, panicking. The ooze soon engulfed Kakuzu's arm and shoulder and was working its way down his body. _

"_Sorry Kakuzu." Hidan said sweetly, smirking at the larger man darkly. "But it's time for you to go."_

"No!" Kakuzu shouted, sitting up. He looked around quickly and realized that it was all just a nightmare. No ooze, no Hidan. Glancing over at the teen next to him (1), Kakuzu shook his head. Scratch that, no _evil_ Hidan. Swinging his legs over to the side of the bed, Kakuzu buried his head in his hand, calming himself down. Checking the clock, the man stood up and made his way to the bathroom, sliding his long-sleeved shirt off in the process. 

As he walked into the bathroom, Kakuzu caught sight of his reflection in the mirror, frowning deeply. The green-eyed man hated mirrors; they only showed him a failure.

A failed experiment. Cracking his knuckles, Kakuzu resisted completely destroying the mirror. He didn't want Hidan or Konan mad at him. He walked across the room and started the shower, making sure the water wasn't too warm. Warm water is more expensive and Kakuzu wasn't exactly the type to waste money, even if it wasn't his.

----

Hidan stirred and opened one eye, turning to glare at the clock. 5:23. Damn. Standing up, the teen made his way over to the bathroom, failing to hear the running water. Hidan opened the door and gasped, realizing that Kakuzu was in the shower. Turning to see what the noise was, Kakuzu tensed as he saw Hidan standing there. The white-haired teen gulped, unable to take his eyes off of the other man.

Kakuzu shuffled a bit. "Hidan-san?" Jumping, Hidan looked up at Kakuzu's face. The teen wouldn't admit it but he hadn't exactly been staring at the man's face. 

"Yeah, Kakuzu?"

"Can you go away? Please?" 

Hidan nodded quickly and ran out of the room, shutting the door in the process. Sitting down on his bed, the teen sighed and slapped himself on the forehead. He was such and idiot! He should have noticed the noise from the shower! It _was_ pretty loud. Kakuzu probably thought he was an idiot of something; he just stood there and stared at him after all! 

After a few minutes of ranting to himself, Hidan looked up to see Kakuzu come out of the shower, dripping wet with a towel around his waist. Kakuzu walked by him, looking away. 

"Hidan-san?"

Hidan jumped yet again at his own name and looked up, failing to fight off a blush. "Yeah?"

"I'm sorry, Hidan-san. I should have locked the door." Kakuzu sighed and sat on the bed, pulling on a tight black shirt. Hidan frowned and shook his head.

"Nah, don't blame yourself, Kakuzu. It's my fault. I should've noticed the shower going." 

Kakuzu looked up at the smaller male and nodded, giving him a faint smile. Hidan turned away, hiding his blush. "But make sure you lock the door next time, heathen!" 

If Hidan would have turned, he would have seen Kakuzu's smile turn to a grin. "Of course, Hidan-san."

----

At breakfast, Hidan was not very surprised to notice Konan gone. The woman was usually gone by this time since her job started very early. Hidan walked into the kitchen, going for the pantry to find something to eat. He glanced at Kakuzu who was standing in the door way, looking uncertain. 

Hidan grinned at the masked man and nodded to the pantry. "Don't worry about what you get. Just find something you like and eat it, alright bastard?" 

Kakuzu nodded, walking closer so he could look over Hidan's shoulder to see. Said teen blushed furiously when Kakuzu reached over him and grabbed the box of Lucky Charms (Yes, Kuzu eats Lucky Charms! They're part of a balanced breakfast!). 

Kakuzu looked at Hidan curiously. "Are you OK, Hidan-san?" 

Hidan nodded in response, looking away. "Yeah, just peachy." He mumbled, grabbing the bread and peanut butter and ducking under Kakuzu's arm. He frowned to himself as he set the items down and went to the refrigerator. Was he actually starting to like this guy?

----

(1) Since they don't have any other beds, Kuzu has to sleep in the same bed as Hidan. I think Konan enjoys this very much....

My longest chapter yet. (dances) Any ways, thank you everyone for reading! Please review! For Kuzu and Hidan! 


	6. Chapter 6

Hidan sat down in his normal spot in third period, sighing to himself. Third period was his favorite because it was one of the few classes he had with Deidara. Said blonde walked into class, sitting down in the seat next to him and smiling cheerfully. 

"Good morning, un!" Deidara said, looking at Hidan and tilting his head. "What's wrong?" 

Hidan sighed again. "You know that guy I told you about yesterday?" He asked, watching the blonde fidget in his seat. When Deidara nodded, Hidan continued. "Well, he's my new roommate." 

Deidara grinned. "Sucks for you, un!" He snickered, leaning back. "How about I come over? You know, to support you through this emotional time." 

"Right. You just want to check Kakuzu out, don't you?" 

"Yep, un! Kakuzu's his name, huh? Cute." Hidan rolled his eyes at Deidara. When someone new came alone, male or female, Deidara wanted to see them and, if they were good looking, he might also flirt with them. 

"No, it's not cute. The guy's probably 6'8", which would be about a foot difference for you." Hidan smirked slightly as Deidara's jaw dropped. "Really, un? Wow, he must be really tall! And there would be an even bigger height difference for you, shorty (1)!"

Hidan pouted, glaring at the blonde. "I am _not_ short!" He hated it when people made fun of his height. 

"Uh-huh, right." Deidara said, rolling his eyes. "I'd ask you to sketch Kuzu but your artistic skills suck." 

Hidan felt his eyebrow twitch at Deidara's new nickname for someone he didn't even know. "Kuzu?" 

The blonde grinned and nodded. "Yeah, the name's cute, un!" 

----

(At the house.) 

Kakuzu sneezed, nearly dropping the plate he was holding. "Hm. Someone must be talking about me." He murmured, placing the plate in the microwave and starting it. As he waited for his meal to cook, Kakuzu walked into the living room and looked around. 

_Ring! Ring!_

The black-haired man jumped as the phone started ringing and walked over to it. After a couple of seconds, Kakuzu decided it would be fine to answer it and pick up the phone. 

"Hello?"

"Zu-chan!" Kakuzu jumped and held the phone away from his ear, eye twitching.

"Kisame-san?"

"Yeah, it's me. How many times have I told you to not to call me 'Kisame-san'? We're friends, no need to be so formal." 

"Fine, _Kisa-chan_." Kakuzu smirked; he could practically _feel_ Kisame pout. "Do you need something?" 

"Yeah, I called to tell you I'll be coming over later to see how you're doing. Later!" Before Kakuzu could protest, Kisame hung up. Sighing, the man shook his head. This would be annoying. Kakuzu checked the time and sighed again. Time to start his mission. Forgetting his meal, Kakuzu put on his jacket and walked out side, locking the door behind him. He had to go meet Hidan. 

----

Hidan and Deidara walked outside, talking to each other quietly. They were just about to start walking towards the bus when Hidan heard someone call his name. Turning around, Hidan blinked when he saw Kakuzu approaching them, waving. 

"Hello Hidan-san. Who's this?" Kakuzu asked, glancing at Deidara curiously. The blonde smiled at Kakuzu cheerfully and held out a hand. 

"My name's Deidara, un! I'm guessing you're Kuzu, right?" The taller man blinked at the name and nodded, taking Deidara's hand. 

"Yeah, I am. Nice to meet you Deidara-san." 

"No need to be so formal! Call me Dei-chan!" 

"…OK…" Kakuzu suddenly looked uncertain, looking at Hidan for an answer. Hidan shrugged and frowned at Kakuzu. 

"What are you doing here Kakuzu?" 

"I'm here to drive you home, Hidan-san. I'll give you a ride too, 'Dei-chan'." Kakuzu turned and walked to the parking lot, closely followed by Hidan and Deidara, who wanted to see the man's car. 

"_That's_ your car!" Hidan asked, eyes bulging. It was a black Lamborghini (2). Kakuzu just shrugged. 

"Yeah. The place where I work gave it to me." 

"Really, un? I need a job there." 

----

When they got home, Hidan and Deidara immediately went for Hidan's room, closing the door behind them.

"Kuzu's cool! You're lucky to be sharing a room with him, un!" 

Hidan shrugged. "I guess." Deidara frowned at this and sat down in front of Hidan. 

"What's wrong, un?" 

Hidan shrugged again. "I don't know. Since Kakuzu came I've been getting this feeling that Konan's keeping something from me." 

Deidara smiled at Hidan reassuringly. "It's probably nothing Hidan. Don't worry! Now, onto more serious topics!" Hidan looked at Deidara, confused. 

"Like what?" 

"Have you seen Kakuzu without his shirt?"

"BAKA!" 

--------

In this I've decided Hidan's 5' 6". Hidan's also over exaggerating about Kakuzu's height, Kuzu's actually only 6' 4". 

Sorry, I'm not really a car person but I wanted Kuzu to have a nice car since the place he 'works' for gave it to him…


	7. Chapter 7

Kakuzu glanced up from the random magazine he had been reading when he heard shouting coming from Hidan's room. The shouting was mostly coming from Hidan, so the black-haired man didn't really worry too much. Looking back at his magazine, Kakuzu frowned. Why was he reading this? As he was just about to put the magazine back where he found it, there was a loud knock on the door. 

"Oi! Zu-chan! Let me in!" Kakuzu rolled his eyes at the annoying nickname and stood, walking over to the door. 

"That's not how you ask to be let in, _Kisa-chan_." He said as sweetly as he possibly could, smirking evilly. 

"_Please_! _Please_ let me in Zu-chan! This neighborhood is scary!" Kakuzu rolled his eyes again and opened the door. Kisame immediately latched onto Kakuzu when the door opened, squeezing the poor man as hard as possible. 

"Thank you Zu-chan! I love you!" Kakuzu's eyebrow twitched as Kisame pecked him on the cheek, even pulling down his mask so he wasn't kissing the cloth. At that moment, Hidan and Deidara had decided to come out into the living room for no apparent reason. 

"Kakuzu? Who's this?" Hidan asked, frowning as he felt a bit of jealousy bubble inside him. Kakuzu just looked at the two younger males blankly and point to Kisame with his free hand. 

"This is Kisame." He said quietly, shrugging. Kisame looked up at Kakuzu and pouted. "But Zu-chan! What happened to 'Kisa-chan'?" 

Kakuzu just shrugged again and turned, walking to the couch. Deidara grinned and latched onto Kakuzu's free arm, looking up at Kakuzu innocently. 

"This is fun, un!"

Kakuzu sighed and tried to push the two males away. Key word there was _tried_. After a couple of attempts at freedom, Kakuzu gave up and sat down, glaring at Kisame and Deidara as they sat down with him. Hidan chuckled at the sight. This was _really_ strange. Sitting down on the couch across from the group, the white-haired teen smirked at Kakuzu. 

"I'd sit with you guys, but there just doesn't seem to be enough room." Hidan continued to smirk as Kakuzu glared at him. 

"Shut up Hidan-san." At this, the teen pouted. 

"Why am I the only one who doesn't get a nickname? I mean Kakuzu has two! I don't even get _one_."

Deidara and Kisame blinked at Hidan and frowned, trying to think of a good name. Everyone in the room was surprised when Kakuzu spoke up again. 

"Fine. How about Hi-chan?" Deidara giggled and nodded. 

"Hi-chan is a good name, un! It's cute, just like Hi-chan!" Hidan glared at Deidara. He wasn't cute! He was handsome! Deidara just grinned back at his friend and, after letting go of Kakuzu, sat next to Hidan. He reached up and pinched the other teen's cheek. 

"Isn't he a cutie?" Hidan's face went red as both Kakuzu and Kisame agreed. He looked away, pouting. 

"Can we do something else? _Please_?" 

----

Hidan yawned and glanced at the other man in the room. They had started watching a movie and Kisame had left halfway through the movie and Deidara's mom (who looked just like him) stopped by to pick the blonde up. Kakuzu was the only one who stayed with Hidan to watch the movie, but he fell asleep thirty minutes into the movie. Hidan stood up and moved closer to the older man, kneeling in front of him. 

"Kakuzu. Wake up." He murmured poking the man's knee. Kakuzu grunted and shifted in his seat, trying to kick Hidan away. 

"Don't wanna…" Hidan smiled at this and sat next to the man, poking his side. This time Kakuzu grunted again and opened an eye, glaring at the white-haired nuisance. 

"What?" Hidan grinned and pushed Kakuzu to completely wake him up. "Time to go to bed, 'Zu-chan'. You need your beauty sleep!" Kakuzu nodded and stood up, looking at Hidan strangely. 

"You're going to bed too, right?" Hidan nodded and grabbed Kakuzu's wrist. 

"Yeah, but I don't want to get up. Carry me?" 

"…Fine." 

Spreading his arms, Hidan looked up at Kakuzu expectantly. The man rolled his eyes and picked the teen up, carrying him bridal style to their room. Kakuzu dropped Hidan on the bed roughly and walked over to his bag of clothes, which had yet to unpack. Hidan watched Kakuzu curiously, wondering if the man would undress in front of him. The teen's hopes were dashed with Kakuzu grabbed his pajamas and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Hidan sighed and removed his shirt and jeans, dropping them on the floor lazily. As Kakuzu came out of the bathroom, he eyed the abandoned clothes and rolled his eyes. Crouching down, Kakuzu picked up the clothes and dropped them in Hidan's dirty clothes basket. Hidan frowned, watching the man strangely.

"You're not my maid. Why'd you do that?" Kakuzu just shrugged and lay down on the bed, yawning.

"I don't want our room to be messy." He murmured, pulling the comforter closer and curling up. He sighed contently and turned to Hidan, smiling slightly. "Good night Hidan." 

Hidan couldn't help but smiled back. "Night Kakuzu." 

----

Konan walked into the house quietly. She glanced at the clock and sighed. 11:35. She only had about five hours to sleep. She had to be up early tomorrow. Putting her purse down, she went to check on Hidan and Kakuzu. When she got to the room, she opened the door and smiled. Kakuzu had his arm around Hidan protectively, guarding the teen even in his sleep. 

"Sweet dreams you two." She whispered, closing the door. 

----

Wow. That ending was fluffy…. Oh well! Thanks for reading and please review! I love my reviews!


	8. Chapter 8

--Two weeks later--

Orochimaru glanced up as Kabuto strolled into his office and place a file on his desk. Smirking, the extremely pale man opened it and examined its contents. 

"Very good Kabuto. You have gathered all the information I requested." He said, looking up at the silver-haired man. "But are you sure all of this is correct?"

Kabuto tensed slightly at the last part and nodded quickly. "Yes Orochimaru-sama. That file holds everything I could find about Akatsuki's experiments. Including experiment 'Immortal'." 

Orochimaru examine the sheet about the experiment and frowned. "They have another subject guarding him?" 

"A failed experiment. Look in the back of the folder for it." 

Orochimaru searched through the information and read it quietly, another smirk forming on his lips. "So they are going to terminated him? Well, this 'Kakuzu' could be a very important pawn in my plan." 

---

Kakuzu twitched as he listened to Hidan go on and on about his stupid god, 'Jashin' or something like that. Did this kid know how to shut up? Kakuzu sighed and stood, walking to the door. 

"Hey, where are you goin'?" Kakuzu paused and turned to Hidan, controlling his urge to glare at the annoying teen. 

"I'm going to get something to eat. Want anything?" The teen just shook his head and Kakuzu left the room as quickly as possible, cheering inwardly. Sweet freedom! As he entered the kitchen, he heard the doorbell ring and Hidan shouting "Can you get that?"

Kakuzu silently prayed it wasn't Deidara. The blonde teen was even more annoying than Hidan. He opened that door and was instantly hugged by an orange blur. Kakuzu vaguely wondered if he had and invisible sign on his head that said 'Please hug whenever possible'. 

"Kakuzu-sempai! I've missed you!" The orange blur shouted, squeezing Kakuzu tightly. 

"Tobi. Get off of Kakuzu." A calm voice said from the doorway. Tobi instantly obeyed, letting go of the large man and turning to the redhead. 

"OK Sasori-sempai!" Tobi said loudly, brushing past Kakuzu and jumping onto the living room couch. Sasori nodded to Kakuzu and motioned for the taller man to follow him into the kitchen. As the redhead walked into the kitchen, he instantly went for the pantry and started to sort through all the food. Kakuzu sat down and watched him curiously. 

"What are you doing?" Sasori looked up, obviously chewing on something he hadn't been chewing on before. 

"Searching for any spying equipment." 

"…Sasori, if you're hungry, just say so."

At this moment Tobi ran into the kitchen, plopped down on a chair and started to stared at Kakuzu intensely. The tall man turned and glared at Tobi. 

"Why are you two here?" 

Tobi suddenly raised his hand and waved it around frantically. "Oh! Tobi knows! Pick Tobi!" 

Kakuzu sighed, nodding to Tobi and resisting the urge to bang his head on something repeatedly. "OK, OK, I pick Tobi. Now tell me."

"Sasori wanted to check out the blonde that Kisame told him about." A loud 'ow' could be heard throughout the house as Sasori's fist met Tobi's head. Sasori rolled his eyes and sat down next to Tobi, glaring at the man. 

"We also came to warn you, Kakuzu. Akatsuki's rival organization, Hebi, has shown some suspicious activity close to this area. We think they are after Hidan."

"How do you know my name, shorty?" All three men at the table turned to stare at Hidan, who had magically appeared in the kitchen. (He just walked….that's not magical.) 

Sasori frowned at Hidan. He _did not_ like to be called _shorty_. "I'm a friend of Konan and Kakuzu. I was just suggesting that they should move to a safer area for your protection."

"Fuck that! There's no way I'm fucking moving for my 'protection'!" The teen turned to glare at Kakuzu challengingly, who in response just shrugged and watched Hidan cautiously. 

"It's not my place to say when we move. That is Konan's decision." He said calmly, standing up and nodding to Sasori and Tobi. 

"I'll tell Konan about this when she gets home. So you can leave now." Sasori nodded also and stood up, quickly followed by Tobi. 

"I'll be back to see the blonde mentioned earlier." Sasori threatened, smirking up at Kakuzu. The taller man smirked back and nodded again. 

"As long as you take him with you, Sasori-san." 

Once they were gone, Hidan demanded that Kakuzu tell him who they were and said man sighed.

"The really short redhead was Sasori and the one in the orange mask was Tobi." 

Hidan glanced at the door and frowned, shaking his head. "They were weird. Are all you're friends strange?" 

Hidan was surprised to suddenly hear laughing coming from the tall man. "I guess they all have their little quirks. But you haven't even seen the strangest ones yet." 

"How could they get stranger?"

-------------------------------------

Oro's the bad guy of this story! Surprising isn't it?XD 

Again, none of theAkatsuki or Orochimaru and Kakuto are mine. Please review! 


	9. Chapter 9

Hidan sat at a table in the food court of a mall Deidara had dragged him to, listening to the blonde talk enthusiastically abo

Hidan sat at a table in the food court of a mall Deidara had dragged him to, listening to the blonde talk enthusiastically about his art project and picking at his food.

"Oi, Hidan! Look, un!" Deidara suddenly shouted in the other teen's ear. Hidan jumped and looked in the direction that the blonde was pointing. Sitting at one of the tables was that strange redhead, Sasori, and Kakuzu. Hidan frowned at the two. Kakuzu had left earlier that day, saying he had business.

"Do you think they're on a date, un? If not, I want the redhead." Hidan shook his head and glared at the blonde.

"No, I think they're talking about work or something. Kakuzu said he had business to take care of."

"Cool, un! Let's spy on 'em!" The next thing Hidan knew, they were hidden behind a plant and straining their ears to hear what the two were saying.

"You really should consider relocating the kid Kakuzu. Orochimaru is a serious threat to Hidan's safety."

Said teen frowned as his name came up and waited for Kakuzu to answer. The black-haired man sighed and shook his head.

"As I said before, it's Konan's decision until Hidan is in immediate danger. Right now Hebi is just a _risk_. Once it becomes anything more than that, I will get Hidan out of there as fast as possible."

Sasori sighed and shook his head. "Kakuzu, you are smarter than this. What about all your training? Is this what Akatsuki taught you?"

"I would rather put off relocating the boy as long as possible. He has friends here. Isn't that why he didn't grow up in a lab? They wanted him to have well developed social skills."

Deidara gasped and pulled on Hidan's shoulder excitedly. "What are they talking about? What do they mean by growing up in a lab?"

Hidan just shook his head slowly and inched closer as the two at the table lowered their voices. "I have no clue, Dei."

"Are you absolutely sure about Hebi, Sasori?"

"Of course, Kakuzu. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't."

Hidan nearly knocked over the plant in front of him when Deidara suddenly poked his shoulder. "What do you want, Dei?"

"I think we should reveal ourselves, un."

Hidan turned to look at Deidara and frowned. "Are you crazy?"

"No, un. But I think you should ask Kakuzu about this."

"…Fine. But I'll ask him at home."

"Ask who what?" Both Deidara and Hidan jumped as Kakuzu's voice came from behind them. They turned to the man slowly and smiled guiltily.

"Go on, un! Ask him Hidan!" Hidan nodded, standing up and looking at Kakuzu nervously.

"What did you mean by me not growing up in a lab? And why are you talking about moving me?"

Kakuzu frowned and glanced at Sasori, who was smirking. "You don't have any orders against it Kakuzu."

The taller man nodded and turned back to Hidan, smiling slightly. "We are talking about moving you because you are in possible danger of being kidnapped by Hebi."

"Possible danger? Why would 'Hebi' want me?"

* * *

Konan tapped her pen on the desk, dozing off at her desk at the Akatsuki 'base'. Suddenly, her head slammed down on the desk and she sat back up quickly, only to be met with a soft chuckle. Konan turned to glare at her boss, a tall man with orange hair and many different piercings.

"What do you want Pein?" The man just grinned and sat on her desk, shrugging.

"Nothing. Just trying to get away from the others." He frowned as Konan looked away, at a picture of two small children. Pein frowned and leaned forward, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Are you OK?"

Konan turned to Pein and nodded, smiling. "Yeah, just thinking."

"About what?" Konan sighed as Pein suddenly grinned at her. The man had strange mood swings.

"About Kakuzu and Hidan. I'm afraid of what Hidan might do without me around. Kakuzu lets him do whatever he wants as long as it doesn't hurt him." Pein chuckled and nodded, picking up the picture that Konan was looking at.

"How old are Kakuzu and Hidan here?"

"Kakuzu's five and Hidan's two."

Pein looked at the picture closely, trying to get his mind around the idea that Kakuzu _had_ be short at one point in his life. Putting the picture down, Pein glanced at Konan, who was watching him sadly.

"I'm sorry Konan. You know it's out of my hands."

"Yeah, I know. I just wish it wasn't."

* * *

"Because you're an important investment to Akatsuki." Sasori said calmly from the table, looking at the blonde behind the plant curiously.

"I'm not an 'investment'! I'm a fucking person with feelings you know."

"In some way you are an investment, Hidan. I'm one too." Hidan turned to Kakuzu and glared at the taller male.

"What do you mean?"

"Akatsuki put a lot of money into some experiments on people. They were trying to make super soldiers. Both of us are results from the same experiment on immortality."

Hidan blinked, processing all the information. He was an experiment? Why hadn't Konan told him? "Immortality?"

Kakuzu nodded and patted Hidan's shoulder gently. "I can't really tell you anything else. Ask Konan about it." Sasori stood up and walked over to Kakuzu, motioning that it was time it leave. Hidan watched them go, frowning.

"That was strange, un."

* * *

The most serious chapter yet! :O Dun, dun, dun!


	10. Chapter 10

Kakuzu shifted through the CD's in the stereo, examining the colorful labels quietly

Kakuzu shifted through the CD's in the stereo, examining the colorful labels quietly. Konan had horrible taste in music. She listened to awful country love songs and bands that just screamed nonsense for 90 of the song. (No offense to people that like that stuff ) He tensed slightly as Hidan walked into the room, he didn't want to answer anymore of the teen's questions.

"Kakuzu?" Said man twitched. Dammit! He said he _didn't _want to answer any questions.

"Yes Hidan?"

"You're not going to find anything good it there."

"…I know." Kakuzu mentally sighed in relief. No questions.

"How come Konan didn't tell me about any of this before?" This time Kakuzu outwardly sighed. He spoke too soon.

"It was to be kept secret until you were a certain age. I think Konan forgot she was supposed to tell you when you turned fourteen."

Hidan pouted at this and folded his arms. "Konan is the forgetful type. She forgot my birthday when I was eight."

"Really? Well, at least you have had birthdays. I've never had one. I don't even know when it is." Hidan looked at Kakuzu in shock for a couple of seconds before grabbing the man's sleeve and pulling towards the kitchen, which was easier said than done.

"What are you doing?" Kakuzu asked as Hidan looked through the pantry.

"We're going to make you a birthday cake since you said you've never had birthday. That's just _wrong_."

Kakuzu just watched Hidan blankly, not really understanding. "So not having a birthday is a bad thing?"

"Of course! You're supposed to get presents and eat cake on your birthday! It's _your_ day."

"I don't think today is my birthday though."

"That doesn't matter Kuzu-chan! You deserve it!" Kakuzu smiled at this and sat down, watching Hidan get out a bowl and crack some eggs. The teen usually just called him by his name. Kakuzu took it as a good sign that Hidan used his nickname.

(Two hours later)

Kakuzu stared at the pink abomination in front of him. Even though it was an eyesore, the man was still touched by that fact that Hidan had made him a cake in the first place. He stood up and walked over to Hidan, who's back was turned to him. Leaning over, Kakuzu pulled Hidan to him and hugged the teen, who squeaked when Kakuzu grabbed him.

After a couple of seconds, Hidan glanced up at the man and grinned. "What was that for?"

"Just wanted to thank you for the cake."

"You could have just said 'thank you'." Hidan pulled away and looked up at Kakuzu, placing his hands on his hips. The taller male shrugged and returned to his seat, smirking slightly.

"I know. I just thought that it wouldn't have expressed my gratitude as well."

"Well, it's good to see you two getting along!" Both Hidan and Kakuzu jumped, surprised by Konan's voice coming from behind them. Konan regarded them with amusement, groceries in her hands and a tall man standing next to her. The man grinned at the two and his groceries down.

"Hey Kakuzu! It's been a while, huh?" Kakuzu nodded and smiled, taking the bags away from Konan and setting them down on the table.

"Hello Pein."

"Your name's Pein? What kind of weird name is that?" The orange-haired man glared at Hidan, folding his arms.

"It's a man's name, kid. No need to take out your jealousy on me."

Hidan rolled his eyes and walked out of the room, followed by an amused Kakuzu. Konan started to put the food away when Pein suddenly latched onto her waist.

"Hey Beautiful. Wanna go out sometime?"

Konan giggled and pushed Pein off, returning to her work. "Maybe some other time, creepy man."

Pein sighed, defeated, and helped the woman put up the groceries.

* * *

Hidan sat on his bed, watching Kakuzu read a magazine and throwing a ball against his wall. He sighed and put the ball down, moving closer to Kakuzu. The older male glanced up from the magazine and frowned at Hidan, who was now fully staring at him with a weird smile.

"What?"

"You _do_ know that's a girl's magazine, right?"

"…Yes. Yes, I do." Hidan's grinned grew at this and he shifted even closer to Kakuzu.

"Then why are you reading it?" Kakuzu sighed and put the magazine down, staring back at Hidan. This staring contest continued until Pein barged into their room.

"Hey lovebirds! Dinner's ready!"

Both Hidan and Kakuzu blushed furiously at this and followed Pein to the kitchen, Hidan cursing the man loudly and chasing after him and Kakuzu following closely, kicking Pein in the shins occasionally. When they finally entered the kitchen, Konan was met with the sight of a very abused Pein.

"What did you two do to him?" Both Hidan and Kakuzu shrugged and sat down at the table, examining their dinner, which had apparently come from McDonald's or some other fast food joint.

"Konan! Help!" Glancing over at the abused male, Konan helped Pein off the floor and sat him down in a chair.

"You're hopeless Pein."

Yes, I know it's short but I got lazy. shrug

Oh well! Any ways! please review! :D


	11. Chapter 11

Hidan stared at his clock in irritation. He had woken up at 6 on a Sunday. He inwardly cursed the sun, which had woken him up in the first place with its evil light of doom. He tried to get comfortable, twisting and turning until he found a good spot. Unfortunately he didn't find one and woke Kakuzu up with his movement.

"What are you doing?" Hidan turned over and looked up at Kakuzu, who just happened to be glaring at him groggily.

"Trying to go back to sleep."

"Well, you would probably succeed if you stopped moving."

"But I can't find a comfortable spot!" Hidan whined, pouting at the older male. Kakuzu sighed and wrapped an arm around the teen, pulling him closer.

"What are you doing?!"

"No need to yell Hidan. I'm right here."

"Answer my question, heathen!"

"Don't call me that. I'm trying to help you get back to sleep."

Hidan frowned, discovering he actually was a lot more comfortable in this position. He glanced up at Kakuzu, who seemed to already be asleep.

"Kakuzu?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

Kakuzu just grunted in response and was soon asleep, only to be woken again by Konan pounding on their door.

"Wake up sleepyheads! We're going out!"

* * *

Hidan decided that his day had been very strange. Konan had taken them to a park, forced Kakuzu on a kid's slide, forced Hidan on the same slide, and then taken them to an art museum. Hidan found himself in an empty hallway, having gotten separated from Konan and Kakuzu.

"Oi! Hidan!" Hidan turned and saw one of the punks from his school, Aiko, standing there, grinning at him.

"What do you want, fuck face?"

"Don't be so mean, Hidan! After all, we have unfinished business." The white-haired teen stood his ground, looking up at the much taller teen.

"Oh, really? What are you going to do? Beat me up?"

"Of course, Hidan!" The teen flinched as he saw the fist but was surprised to find that he didn't feel it. Opening his eyes, Hidan saw Kakuzu holding the punk's fist, glaring down at the taller teen. Aiko doubled over as Kakuzu's fist connected with his stomach, swearing loudly and falling to his knees.

"Hasn't anyone ever told you to pick on people your own size?" Kakuzu asked, letting go of Aiko and walking away. Hidan followed quickly, not wanting to get separated from the larger male again.

"That was awesome! Thanks for defending my Kakuzu!"

"No problem. It's my job after all."

(Later that day)

Hidan sat in his living room, watching TV and occasionally smelling the scent of the dinner Kakuzu was making. Konan had strangely disappeared after they got home, leaving him and Kakuzu by themselves.

"Oi, Kakuzu! What are you makin'? It won't kill me right?"

"Shut up. No, it won't kill you." Kakuzu growled from kitchen, glaring at Hidan and somehow flipping the food at the same time.

"Watch the food, dammit! You're going to fucking drop it!"

Kakuzu rolled his eyes and turned back to the food, muttering something under his breath. Hidan stood up and made his way over to the taller man. Once he got close enough he poked Kakuzu's side, making the other man squeak.

"Did you just squeak?" Hidan asked, grinning widely. "The giant just squeaked!"

Kakuzu rolled his eyes again and hit Hidan over the head, forgetting that he was supposed to be protecting the teen. Hidan rubbed his head and glared at Kakuzu, huffing indignantly.

"Why'd you hit me you bastard?!"

"'Cause I wanted you to shut up, bitch."

"…Wow."

"What?"

"That's the first time I heard you curse."

Kakuzu shook his head and turned back to the food, which was now very burnt. Glancing at Hidan, who was saying something about rubbing off on him, Kakuzu threw the food away and took out his wallet with a pained expression.

"I guess we're ordering take-out."

* * *

Itachi looked around the dark alley suspiciously. God knows why he was out here. He pressed himself against the wall when he heard hushed voices come from the other side of the alley.

"So you will take care of it, right? Orochimaru-sama does not accept failure."

"I'll take care of it Kabuto! Orochimaru should know that he can trust ol' Suigestsu!"

"Alright. I'm going to go inform Karin that she'll be working with you. You can contact Juugo."

"What about that insider? Aren't you going to get him?"

"Moron! Of course I'll contact him! Do I have to spell everything out for you?"

"I get it now! Don't be so mean! What about that immortal project you were telling me about?"

"I'll send you the information later. You'll have to send Orochimaru's message along."

"Yeah, yeah. See ya."

After the figures left, Itachi took out his cell phone and quickly dialed Kisame's number. He checked his watch and smirked. Seems he'd be interrupting the man's sleep. He'd consider this revenge for the times Kisame's interrupted his sleep.

"Hello?"

"Hello Kisame. Having sweet dreams?"

"Itachi? It's pretty late for you to be calling isn't it?"

"I think Orochimaru's planning on sending a message to Hidan. Please warn Kakuzu. Good night Kisame." Itachi hung up before Kisame could respond and left the alley quickly, not wanting to be mugged by some low life.

This chapter's probably the one that took the longest to write. ; Sorry. Ita has finally appeared! Yay! Next is Zetsu!


	12. Chapter 12

Thank you everyone for reviewing! It made me very happy! :3 I'm glad you like my story so far! Now, let's get on with the story!

--

Hidan grumbled to himself as he shifted through all the junk in the attic. Konan had told him to do chores once he got home and put Kakuzu in charge of making sure they got done. The older male sat a couple of feet away from Hidan, reading another one of his girly magazines. The teen muttered a couple of curses and tried to lift a particularly large box. Unfortunately, the box was much heavier than it looked and Hidan failed to lift it.

"Something wrong?" Kakuzu asked, not even looking away from his magazine.

"No. I can handle it." Hidan growled as he struggled to pick up the box. Kakuzu set down the magazine and walked over to Hidan, helping the teen lift the cardboard menace. Hidan murmured his gratitude and returned to putting things away quietly. Kakuzu also returned to what he had been doing until he heard Hidan yelp.

"What happened?"

"That fucking knife tried to kill me!" Hidan shouted, pointing at the knife and showing Kakuzu the large gash on his arm. The stitched man examined the wound and stuck a hand in his pocket, pulling out a needle.

"Hold still." Kakuzu murmured, rolling up one of his sleeves. Hidan watched as Kakuzu undid one of the stitches on his arm and a long, black thread slither out.

"What the hell is that?!"

"Stop yelling. The wound needs stitches and I don't happen to have any thread."

"But how the fuck did that thing come out of your arm?!"

"It is too hard to explain all the scientific stuff so I'll put it simply. In the experiments I told you about, one of the scientists thought this would be a good idea. Now shut up and hold still!"

Hidan did as he was told, wincing as the needle pierced his skin. He looked up at Kakuzu, who had a serious look on his face, his eyes concentrating on the wound. After about twenty minutes Kakuzu finished, putting the needle back in his pocket and fixing the stitching on his arm.

"How do you know how to do that?"

"It's pretty easy when you've had to do it hundreds of times."

"So, not only do you read girl magazines, but you also know how to sew. You're really a girl, aren't you?"

Kakuzu just hit Hidan over the head in response, muttering something along the lines of "This is the thanks I get?"

"I'm just kiddin' Kuzu! Thanks." Hidan said, grinning and hugging Kakuzu. The older man smiled and wrapped an arm around Hidan, pulling him closer. The teen yelped as Kakuzu messed up his hair and tried to get away, pushing against the man's side. Once he was freed, Hidan glared up at Kakuzu, pouting.

"What the fuck was that for?"

The teen huffed as Kakuzu only laughed at him and stood up, walking over to the doorway. Hidan jumped up and ran in front of him, blocking Kakuzu exit.

"I'm not done thanking you yet!"

"Oh? What next?"

Hidan stood on the tips of his toes and kissed Kakuzu on the cheek before running out of the room, laughing loudly. Kakuzu blinked and touched his cheek, blushing slightly.

"Weird kid."

--

Itachi glared up at Kisame, who was currently fusing over the Uchiha's hair.

"I'm so sorry Itachi-san! I didn't mean to spill my soda on you!"

Itachi just jerked away from Kisame and walked away, muttering something about clumsy fish. Kisame sighed and crouched down to collect the papers he had dropped.

"You two have another fight?"

Kisame glanced up at Kakuzu, blinking in surprise. Wasn't the man supposed to be with Hidan?

"Pein called me down here. Needed to talk to me about something. Need any help?"

"No, I got it. What did he need to talk to you about?"

"Hidan's schooling. I have to tutor the gaki." Kisame laughed and at Kakuzu's obvious frustration.

"Oh well, not much you can do about it, huh? What's the kid failing any ways?"

"Math."

"Then you're the perfect tutor! You're even better than Itachi at math!"

"We agree. Kakuzu is the ideal tutor." Both men jumped as Zetsu chimed in, revealing his presence behind them.

"Dammit Zetsu! You nearly gave me a heart attack!" Kisame shouted, glaring at the green-haired man. Zetsu smirked slightly and pointed to the other end of the hall.

"You're late for a meeting you know."

"Gah! I forgot! See ya Kakuzu!" In only a matter of seconds, Kisame was at the other end and running through the door, shouting at everyone to wait. Kakuzu chuckled at the scene and turned to Zetsu, who was staring hungrily at a couple of people walking by.

"You'll scare them away if you keep staring, Zetsu."

--

Sorry it's so short. I got kind of lazy….

This chapter's more for the development of Kuzu's 'relationship' thingies. And to introduce Zetsu-sama of course!

Any ways, I stuck to my word! Zetsu-sama's in this one! Yay! He'll become more important as the story progresses…maybe…I could change my mind….

Hopefully he'll become more important! XD


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